The Fast and The Furious (Oh Yeah!!)

So I just went and saw The Fast and the Furious: Tokyo Drift, and I loved it!! Which, I’m sure, is not too big of a surprise to anyone who knows me. Fast cars, kick ass racing scenes, and very hot, scantily clad Asian women – how can you go wrong? So let’s start with the critics’ reviews of the movie (since that’s always fun) and go from there. Not surprisingly, pretty much all the critics out there made negative comments about the plot and the acting. And much as I hate to admit it, I can’t really disagree with them too much. As tends to be the case with these sorts of movies, the plot is pretty thin and really pushes the bounds of believability (the flimsy excuse to get the main character to Tokyo was especially weak). And none of the acting was exactly Oscar caliber (but I do have to give props to Sung Kang, who plays Han – I was pretty impressed with his performance). But as anyone who was excited about this movie coming out is likely to tell you, who really cares?!

And much to my surprise, a number of movie critics out there actually got this point. As a matter of fact, you could probably break the reviews down into two categories. First are those critics who made their justified criticisms about the plot and the acting, but then went on to comment that fans of the genre aren’t going to care about this, and that it has great racing scenes and is visually just great to watch (which is absolutely the case – the drifting scenes are unbelievable!). Then there’s the second group (who in my opinion shouldn’t be allowed to review anything other than independent, art-house films), who make all their focus on the weak plot and unbelievable storyline, some of whom go so far as to say that there’s too much emphasis put on the racing and not enough on the plot. Excuse me??? Are you kidding me here?! I’m sorry, but going to see this sort of movie and complaining that there’s too much emphasis on the racing and not enough on the plot is about as idiotic as going to see a porn movie and then complaining that there was way too much time spent focusing on the sex scenes!!! DUH!!!

Normally I try to avoid commenting on specific reviews; for one thing, I generally read the review on imdb, which gives quotes from various critics and an overall view of how critics felt about the movie, which means I don’t actually read any critic's complete review (which is intentional, since too many critics have a bad habit of giving away plot points I’d just as soon not have revealed until I see them in the movie). And I don’t like being too negative or critical about specific people (you never know – they may actually find out about my blog and sue me or something; stranger things have happened, I’m sure). But in this particular case, I have to make an exception, because imdb had a critic’s comment that was so idiotic I actually had to track down and read the entire review. And I’m here to tell you, if you want to see a page of pointless and inane drivel that completely misses the point of the entire flippin’ movie, then go check out the review for this movie on USA Today's website. Oh my God! She not only complains that the acting in the movie will put you to sleep (who the hell is paying attention to the acting), but she has the audacity to recommend that if you’re into automobiles that you check out Cars instead! Yeah, because an animated kiddie movie with talking cars is going to be some much more intense and exciting and adrenaline-filled than a movie with REAL cars in REAL races!! How silly of me! (I do have to admit that I haven't had a chance to see Cars yet (I spent most of last weekend when it opened at a soccer tournament), so I can't comment on what sort of racing is in that movie, but all things considered, it's pretty easy to guess that there's no comparison between the two films).

Whew! Okay, got that out of my system. I’ve been fuming about that and needing to vent about it from the minute I read the review, before I even saw the movie. But now I have seen it, and I can now say with absolute conviction that any critic who didn’t say the movie was worth seeing by anyone who loves car racing is a complete hack who needs to find another line of work. Just because it’s not your cup of tea doesn’t mean it’s a bad movie, and you can’t judge every movie by the same narrowly focused classifications. You need to look at what type of movie it is, what the priorities are for the people who are likely to want to see the movie, and whether or not the movie meets those priorities. Which means that not every movie has to be vying for Best Picture! If it’s a horror movie, it needs to be scary; if it’s a comedy, it needs to be funny; if it’s an action movie, it needs to be fast-paced and action-packed. And if you can’t keep that in mind when you’re writing your review of the movie, you’re not only wasting your readers’ time, but you’re doing a complete disservice to those people who are actually trying to use your review to help them decide if it’s a movie they’d enjoy or not (which is why I don't pay any attention whatsoever to critics when deciding what movies I'm going to see).

Damn, I just can’t get off the critic-bashing rant today (guess that tells you how emotional I get over bullshit reviews of movies I like). But anyways, let’s get back to the topic at hand – The Fast and The Furious: Tokyo Drift. Firstly, as you’ve probably guessed from the trailers, this one has a brand new set of characters with no ties to the previous movies at all. Which is fine, because as I commented on (repeatedly) above, that’s not what the movie is about. The movie is about racing. And specifically in this case, it’s about drifting, which I won't bother explaining to you because they do a pretty good job explaining it in the movie (and in the trailers for the movie, as far as that goes). All that needs to be said is that it is incredibly fun to watch.

So here's the plot in a nutshell: the main character goes to Japan to live with his estranged father (as mentioned above, the reasoning for this is pretty flimsy and falls completely within the realm of "only in Hollywood"), and once there gets involved in the world of drift racing. Not surprisingly, he knows nothing about drifting, and pretty much totals the car he borrows for his first race by slamming into walls, parked cars, etc., every time he tries to round a curve (the race takes place inside a parking garage of all places, with the racers racing to the top of the garage). But naturally he makes a few friends and slowly learns the ropes of drifting until he’s a top-notch racer. And at the same time, of course, he makes enemies with the best racer around by showing an interest in his girlfriend (who of course returns that interest). Kind of reminds me a lot of the original The Fast and The Furious, but that’s certainly not a bad thing. And things progress from there – I won’t bore you with the details; if you really want to know what happens, go see the movie!

In conclusion, all I can say is when you walk out of the theater completely pumped, and can practically feel the adrenaline racing through you, you know you’ve seen a good racing movie. And that’s exactly how I felt coming out of this movie. And there’s a little surprise at the end of the movie that is just really kickass that makes you feel just that much more pumped and excited and glad you saw the movie (at least it did for me). Hell, I’ll probably go see the movie a second time before it leaves the theaters. Take that, USA Today!!

The Break-Up

So I actually went and saw The Break-Up yesterday (despite it being an obvious chick/date movie). I went to the early matinee on Sunday, and there were a pair of older couples, a handful of women, and me at the theater (but I’m enough of a diehard movie buff that I didn’t even care that I was the only solo guy there). I went to see this movie for two reasons: one, I’ve always found Vince Vaughn to be incredibly funny, and two, the trailers for the movie made me realize just how hot (in a girl-next-door way, mind you, but still hot nonetheless) Jennifer Anniston really is (but I’d still take Angelina Jolie if I had to make a choice between the two – you go, Brad. And let me add – happy 31st birthday Angelina!! (June 4th – just happened to see that on imdb’s home page while I was writing this)).

The movie was both surprisingly good, and not nearly as funny as I expected it to be. Vince Vaughn isn’t so much funny as he is just obnoxious in this movie, but that’s not a bad thing, because that’s exactly what his character is supposed to be. Despite how you might feel from watching the trailers, once the movie starts you’re very quickly rooting for Jennifer Aniston’s character, because Vince Vaughn is really just a horribly inconsiderate boyfriend. And I noticed in the opening credits that he gets both producer and story writer credits for the movie, so it’s pretty obvious he had himself in mind when he wrote the role, which makes it really easy for him to inhabit the character and make you believe the character.

The movie starts out at a baseball game where Vince Vaughn first notices Jennifer Aniston, who’s actually there with another guy. He approaches her at the end of the game in the most obnoxiously charming way imaginable (pretty much acting just the way you’d expect a Vince Vaughn character to act), with Jennifer Aniston seeming less than impressed by him. But then the opening credits start with photo booth photos of the couple making goofy faces and poses (as most people seem to do when they’re in a photo booth), and then as the credits roll we’re treated to a very well thought out and presented series of photos showing the development of the couple’s relationship, from their early dating to shots of the couples’ bowling team that they’re on, holidays together, and of course them buying the condo that becomes the key focus during their breakup. When the credits finish and we see the couple again they’ve gone from having just met to having been dating for two years.

We start with the two people’s day jobs, and then when they get home that evening they pretty much go right into the big fight that leads to their break-up. Of course, Jennifer Anniston doesn’t really want to break up, she just wants her boyfriend to be more appreciative and more willing to do things for her and with her whether he personally wants to do them or not. And so the story of the movie is basically her various attempts to make him realize what he’s missing, make him jealous, etc., and his reactions to her attempts (one thing I do have to say – if Jennifer Anniston really wants to move past Friends and get fully into a movie career, she really needs to play characters that don’t immediately make you think of Rachel, which this character does in several instances).

One thing I found somewhat ironic, considering that the two actors involved supposedly are now dating after having made the movie together, is the fact that there are no lovemaking scenes, no kissing, no real intimacy of any sort between the two characters, since they’re basically fighting throughout the entire movie (the photos in the opening credits show numerous still shots of such moments, but that’s the only place). But hey, that’s Hollywood for you.

As I said before, this movie isn’t as funny as you’d think from the previews (something a number of critics complained about). There are certainly comic moments, and some really funny scenes, but mostly it’s more of a dramedy about two people who seem to really love each other, but who have very different personalities and backgrounds, and are at a crossroads in their relationship where they have to decide if they can overcome their differences in order to stay together as a couple. And they not only do a very good job with the story (regardless of what the critics think), but it also goes against the standard, cliched formulas you've seen done over and over again in romantic comedies (whether they do it right is something for each viewer to decide. I personally think they did). The ending is somewhat surprising, and VERY non-Hollywood, but it so perfectly fits the way the story and characters develop (and so plays out as more believable than the ending to the average romantic comedy) that I was really impressed, and just overall happy with the story as a whole when I left the theater.

I highly recommend this movie for couples, people who enjoy romantic films or relationship films, or for anyone who wants to see Jennifer Aniston’s bare butt (even if it’s not the best shot of it in the world, it’s still nice to watch). :-)

The Big X-Men Finale

So X-Men: The Last Stand premiered over Memorial Day weekend, breaking all kinds of records by the time the weekend was over. I’d hoped to get this review out a little sooner, but it was just been one of those weeks, and sadly by the time I’d gotten home from work every evening last week, I just didn't have the motivation to do much of anything, so I had a hell of a time getting focused on getting this done (but on the plus side, at least it didn’t take a month or more to do it!). With that said, I have to say that as far as the big finale to the X-Men trilogy goes, I was pretty disappointed. To be fair, I think Brett Ratner did a pretty good job taking over as director from Bryan Singer (which was of course my biggest concern before the movie came out, since I’m a very big fan of Bryan Singer’s, and he did such a fantastic job with the first two movies). And visually it was very exciting and enjoyable to watch (but that’s to be expected). The story, on the other hand, I have A LOT of complaints about. Now, before I continue any further with this review, I need to make two disclaimers:

Disclaimer #1: If you’ve never really read the comics and only know the X-Men characters/stories from the previous two movies, then you will probably very much enjoy the third movie just as much as you did the previous two. The vast majority of my criticisms of the movie are coming from someone who is a long-time reader of the comics. The screenwriters took a lot of liberties and did a lot of things with the characters especially that as a fan of the comics I was very unhappy with. So if you’re not a reader of the comics, don’t let my negative comments dissuade you from seeing the film – you’ll probably have little or no problems with it, and will wonder what the hell I’m so upset about.

Disclaimer #2: Some of the comments/criticisms in this review will be fairly vague and non-specific (which is going to be really difficult for me because there’s a lot that I’d really, really like to go into detail about). The reason for this is that any details I might give about the things I have a problem with would be MAJOR spoilers for anyone who hasn’t seen the movie. So on the off chance that one of my small handful of readers (assuming any of you are still out there after my long periods of no new entries) reads this review and hasn’t seen the movie yet, I don’t want to spoil it for you by revealing things that happen in the movie that are supposed to come as a surprise. So we’ll see how well I do venting my frustrations with the script without giving away too many surprises or key plot points.

Also, I’d just like to quickly say that I’m not going to make any comments about the critics’ reviews of the movie, because it is patently obvious that not only are they as clueless as always, but not a one of them has so much as looked at the cover of an actual X-Men comic, much less read one, so as far as I’m concerned, their opinions are completely meaningless here. And so with all that out of the way, on with the review. Let’s start with the positive (and there were certainly things about the movie I did like). For starters, the biggest thing I liked about the movie was that the various new characters (with one glaring exception, which I’ll get into later) were all great! It would have been nice if some of them would have gotten more screen time, but they were still great to see. Both Kitty Pryde and Colossus are both back (with Kitty, at least, played by a different actress than previously) with bigger roles than before, which I loved. The additions of Beast and Angel are both fantastic (Kelsey Grammer was unbelievably good as Beast), although it would have been nice to see Angel have a bigger role in the movie (he plays an important part to the story, but isn’t really IN the movie all that much). Another mutant addition that it was great to see (and something of a surprise as well) was Multiple Man, although his character was way under-used.

The character I most enjoyed seeing in the movie was Leech, a young boy whose mutant power is that he cancels out other mutants’ powers. The movie uses his blood as the source for the mutant “cure” that’s at the crux of the plot. The one thing I was curious about going into the movie, however, was that in the comic book Leech’s power actually has a radius effect, and any mutant getting too close to him is affected by his power (it's not just his blood). I was impressed to see that they did bring this into the movie, and used it to good effect as well. I also like the young actor who portrays Leech – Cameron Bright, who I previously discussed in my review of Ultraviolet. I'll be interested to see how his career develops, and whether or not he disappears off the map once he gets older, as numerous other young child actors have done.

Another pleasant surprise in this movie was the addition of Dr. Moira MacTaggart, a non-mutant character who is a big part of the comics. Her name appears in a list of computer files at one point in X2 (you pretty much have to pause the DVD at a certain spot and look closely to see it, something I did just to see how many of the names listed I could identify from the comics), and she finally appears in person in the third movie. Interestingly enough, she’s not actually in the end credits, and shows up on imdb as uncredited (which is somewhat strange considering that she plays a fairly sizable part for a secondary character – but that’s Hollywood for you). Which brings up something else I’ve liked about all three of the X-Men movies. In all of them, I’ve found that if you watch the end credits closely (or check out the movies’ entries on imdb), you discover all kinds of characters that although they make little or no mention of their names in the movies, they are actual characters from the comics. For example, Jubilation Lee, a young Asian girl who actually was first created for the original X-Men cartoon, and then moved into the comics from there, has appeared in all three movies, and is listed in the credits for all three as Jubilee (her "superhero" name), but is only shown in group scenes of the students during the films – her name is never given in the movies, but if you're a fan of the comics you can fairly easily pick her out and know who she probably is. So even though she has a minimal role, and never even uses her mutant powers, they still made a point of identifying her character in the credits, which I thought was kind of cool (especially since I always liked her character). I kept hoping they’d eventually give her a bigger role (like they finally did with Kitty Pryde in the last movie), but at least she’s in all the movies.

There are numerous other characters that are in this same category, but I’m not going to take the time and effort to name all of them (I do have to say, though, that I've always felt the inclusion of these numerous additional characters actually taken from the comics, whether you caught who they were before you saw them listed in the credits or not, was a nice bonus for the fans of the comics that the filmmakers didn't have to do, but did anyways). If you’re a fan of the comics, check out the credit listings on imdb (if you haven't already); you’ll be surprised at just what characters they actually have listed in the credits (although there are a few that I STILL haven't actually been able to place in the movies when I re-watched them).

One more character I do need to talk about, though, before me move onto other things, is the one character who had no business whatsoever being in the final movie, and that is Cain Marko, AKA Juggernaut. Yes, he’s from the comic books, and is actually a fairly significant villain (also, for those who don't know, he's actually Professor Xavier’s step-brother, which is the main connection he has to the X-Men in the comics). There are two problems with including him in the movie, however. Number one, he was a fairly dumb and annoying character in the comics, and they make him an even dumber and more annoying character in the movie. Number two, despite how they might mislead you in the movie, Juggernaut is NOT, in any way, shape, or form, a mutant, which of course means he would have no place in Magneto’s Brotherhood of Mutants. All of Juggernaut’s powers came from a mystical crystal in his helmet (which is why he never took it off – without it he was powerless). So for the moviemakers to bring in not only an annoying character from the comics, but one who’s not even really a mutant, just really, really bugged me. This was an obvious weak spot in the film that could have been avoided (although there is one amusing scene with Juggernaut that I did like).

One last quick comment about the credits of the movie, and then we’ll move on. I love the fact that the movie featured R. Lee Ermey as the voice of an army sergeant. He is so perfect for that sort of role, and I just love it whenever I see him making a cameo appearance in a movie (he’s so the go-to guy whenever moviemakers need a great Army/Marine sergeant character, even if they’re just using his voice). And in looking at the imdb listing, I discovered that the movie not only featured the obligatory Stan Lee cameo, but there was also a cameo by Chris Claremont, a LONGTIME Uncanny X-Men writer and creator of numerous Marvel characters.

And now, onto some of the other things I liked about the movie. The actors all did a very good job, and even those who’s roles were way smaller than they should have been gave wonderful performances. And of course, as I mentioned earlier, visually the movie was indeed very exciting and top notch. And the action scenes were all very well done. But all of this was to be expected and so it's not exactly high praise for the movie (it would be a major criticism of the movie if these areas weren't well done, but it's not really a compliment to the movie that they were). The big problem is that the story has so many things wrong with it (in my opinion) that it really takes away from everything else. That being said, let’s get to what I found wrong with the movie.

Where to start, where to start. Well, I guess the first place to start is with Hollywood’s love of the trilogy. Three so seems to be the magic number. Yes, you do have a number of franchises that make many, many more movies than that, but by and large it’s all about the trilogy, and so as soon as the studio greenlights a sequel to a movie, it’s generally assumed that a third movie will be done, and then barring huge success, they’ll stop there (I also think that any more whenever there’s franchise potential, they’ll get actors to sign a three picture deal so that they know they’ll have them at a set salary for at least three pictures – which means that if there is a fourth movie, they have the problem that the actors can either opt out of further films, or ask for quite a bit larger salaries if the first three movies have been very successful). That seems to be the attitude that the screenwriters took on X-Men: The Last Stand – this is the last movie in the trilogy, so we can do whatever the hell we want to with the story and the characters. Which is exactly what they did. I won’t go into details because I don’t want to put in any spoilers, but they do some things to some of the major characters that really pissed me off, because it so goes against what’s in the comics. I think any fan of the comics would be upset with what they did.

Now, having said the above, I will concede that they do leave hints at the end of the movie that point to a possible fourth film (but let’s face it, that’s pretty much standard for ANY movie with franchise potential or that’s part of a franchise, whether there’s any plans whatsoever to do another movie or not, so that really means absolutely nothing these days). Oh, on that subject, if you do go to see the movie, make sure you stay all the way until the very end of the end credits.

Another aspect of the story that annoyed me, but wasn’t nearly as big a deal as what they did to the characters, is the state the country is in when the movie starts. Admittedly it has been three years between movies, but the student characters don’t really seemed to have aged that much (as far as how they’re portrayed in the film) and things at the school just don’t feel like that much time has passed (but maybe that’s just me). But the world at large in the movie shows enough changes to make it feel like even more than three years have passed. There’s a new president, and we have a brand new government department, The Department of Mutant Affairs, and mutants are a common, everybody knows about them minority in the country. It just feels like too many things have changed between the second and third films. And then there’s Hank McCoy, AKA Beast, the Secretary of Mutant Affairs. He shows up out of the blue (no pun intended), and when he arrives at Xavier’s school, he’s greeted like an old friend by Storm and Professor X, but Wolverine acts as if he’s never met him before. And we are given the impression that Beast was once an X-Man, but no details into his history or connection to the group or the school are mentioned; you’re just expected to assume that there is one, which just bothered me as being a weak point in the story that they just decided not to bother going into.

Another thing that bugged me was a group of mutants the movie shows getting together to protest the new “mutant cure”. My guess is they’re meant to represent, or are inspired by, the Morlocks, a society of mutants in the comics who live in tunnels underneath Manhatten because unlike the X-Men they don’t have cool superpowers, they’re just freaks of nature whose physical mutations are blatant and extreme enough to make them outcasts of society. Part of my reason for linking the group of mutants in the movie to the Morlocks is that one of the characters there who joins Magneto (the woman who can sense other mutants) is listed in the credits as Callisto, who in the comics rises to become leader of the Morlocks. But instead of showing us a group of obvious mutants (which would be REALLY easy considering the F/X make-up and CGI abilities that movie studios have these days), what we get is basically just a group of vagabond homeless people, some of whom are fairly obviously mutants. This, in my opinion, was just laziness on the part of the filmmakers.

Well this thing has gotten long enough that I think I’ll stop there. That should give you an overall view of my feelings about this movie. Again, if you’re not a big reader of the comics, most of my complaints will mean little to you, and if you liked the previous films, you should enjoy this one just as well. But as for me, I’m unhappy enough about some of the story decisions of the movie (among other things) that I won’t be bothering to see it a second time at the theaters (something I felt sure I’d do from watching the trailers and from how much I liked the previous movies), and it’ll be up in the air as to whether or not I pick it up on DVD. But that’s just me.

And so we conclude our latest entry. I actually have my review of this weekend’s movie, The Break-Up, completed as well, but it’s still sitting in Word (and it's way past my bedtime and I've got work tomorrow, so it's going to have to wait). So as soon as I get it copied into blogger and all the imdb links put in, it will be published as well; barring unforeseen delays, it should be up on Monday. Until then! :-)